Stop Expecting Perfection

This last week has been a reminder to me that regardless of what you know, what you say, and what you stand for things don’t always work out. Stop expecting perfection because you’ll only be let down. Since we live in a world with other humans, we’ll be let down and we will let others down as well. More importantly when we expect perfection, and settle for nothing less, that leads to unhappiness.

I could go on and on about all the times I’ve been let down by people in my life. Some were seemingly small transgressions – until I gave them more power than needed. I’m certain I’ve lost friendships and potential friendships because my disappointment led to hurt.

On the flip side of that, I know I’ve let people down. In fact, it hurts me to think of times I have, I can look back and see more clearly now. In some cases I apologized and tried to make things right. Wish I could say I always succeeded but that would not be true.

The only thing I can say for sure is that it was never my intention to hurt someone. Yet I did. I acted on emotion, jumped to conclusions, I can be defensive. Knowing this is true for me begs the question, can I not afford others the same? Can I NOT think they were trying to hurt me or that I didn’t matter to them?

No One is Perfect

I know you know that. But it is worth repeating that no one if perfect. We learn from the mistakes we make. Without making a mistake we cannot grow. So, what does this mean for us? Well, I hope what you and I can take away from all of this is the reminder that we are all doing the best we can with what we have in the moment.

It would be so nice if those we cared about never let us down or hurt our feelings. But that just isn’t how life works. Some of us are more sensitive some of us are more fragile, it’s hard to know sometimes. The one thing we can always know is that not a single one of us will get it right all the time, we can only try to do better.

Start Doing These Things Today

I will always believe that happiness is a personal choice. If you start doing these things today you can be happier!

take responsibility for your actions and mistakes
apologize when needed and use “I” language and don’t say “but you”
let go of past transgressions- sure you’ll never forget but you can forgive
understand that your spouse is not perfect
focus on the positive rather than the negative – sure things go wrong but LOTS of things go right!
spend time and energy on those who lift you up and stop trying to be everyone’s cup of tea

We are all a work in progress and once we make peace with that it makes things much easier. Having unrealistic expectations placed on us is suffocating and painful – so try not to do that to others.

As always, I hope this gives you something to think about. Trust me when I say it’s easier said than done. In the last week I’ve had issues come up at work and in my personal life that have caused me a great deal of grief and disappointment. I’ve tried hard to handle them with grace but it’s been work. I share this because I want you to know that we all deal with these kinds of difficulties and it’s not a reflection of who you are. Perspective is everything, maybe it’s time for a change?

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Stop Expecting Perfection