Dealing with Disappointment

No matter who you are, you’ve been disappointed. It’s one of the feelings we can all relate to and is some ways it binds us together. Recently Taylor swift had to cancel a concert and the disappointment was palpable; regardless of the country, the people, the language we all understood. But it’s how you deal with that disappointment that ultimately decides the quality of your life.

Over the weekend we got some crushing news. Saturday afternoon I was writing blog posts for the week and stopped to pack for a trip. On Wednesday morning I’m flying to NJ for a Thursday evening wedding followed by a long weekend to see our son in Philadelphia. The trip has been on the books for months. My formal gown for the black tie wedding has been purchased. I cut the tags off Saturday and set about organizing all that I’d need to pack. I happened to pick up my phone (I always keep it on silent btw) only to see I had missed a few text messages. Long story short – the wedding was called off.

My first thought of course was for the bride and groom, how utterly devastating. This news set in motion an afternoon of changing plans and phone calls. As it turns out, we’re still going on the trip. Sure we won’t be at a wedding but we’ll visit other family, we’ll make the best of our time in Jersey and then head to Philly to see our son. I am honestly so very excited but at the same time, my thoughts turn to the couple who called things off. While it’s not my story to share nor my tale to tell, the one thing I can say is that in a situation like this, there is a lot of disappointment all around. The family, the guests, the couple, everyone and anyone who had anything to do with this event.

Different Levels of Disappointment

There are most certainly different levels of disappointment. You might be disappointed the grocery store is out of your favorite orange juice and that pales in comparison to the disappointment you feel when a loved one lets you down in a big way. There’s the disappointment we might feel when a child doesn’t pursue the career path we thought they would, we feel disappointed when not chosen for a job, when our feelings are hurt. The reality is there is always something we could feel disappointed about.

Usually I am the one to step back and assess the situation. Then put things into perspective; it could always be worse, right? I am a believer in things working out even if they seem like they won’t. I know there is a plan and I also know that one day those who are disappointed (including me) can look back and see the blessing in it.

It’s Hard

It’s hard. Get used to it. There, I said it. No one wants to hear that and it seems pretty blunt. Well, it is but what good is sugar coating? If you never knew the feelings of disappointment you’d never know joy or happiness. You’d never learn the skill of perseverance, of being resourceful, of digging deep.

Accept that it’s hard sometimes, we don’t get what we want or what we think we deserve. No one does. So much unhappiness stems from comparison. We compare ourselves to the best version of someone else and it whittles away at our happiness and contentment.

The next time you are disappointed remember that this is part of life and that you are going to grow. You have an opportunity to change things. What will you do differently? Will you be a victim? Will you allow your joy and peace to be stolen? Keep in mind that tough seasons eventually come to an end. When they do the joy we feel is to be celebrated!

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Dealing with Disappointment